Interesting Psychology Team
If you often find yourself disappointed in others, it’s likely the result of unrealistic expectations. This can be true of situations or relationships.
Perhaps you didn’t get the job you wanted, but the truth is, you weren’t really qualified for it. Or maybe someone didn’t come through for you as you’d hoped, but they didn’t even know what you wanted from them.
When it comes to relationships, we all deserve fundamental things like respect and a decent level of reciprocity. But we also have to remember that we’re all at different places in our lives, and some people just can’t meet you where you’re at for various reasons.
You can build better relationships with others when you stop expecting the following things from them.
1 – Constant Agreement
If you want everyone to agree with you on everything, you might be waiting a while. Everyone’s entitled to their own thoughts and opinions. After all, those differences bring out unique perspectives and help us evolve and find better solutions.
Instead of getting bothered or upset when someone disagrees with you, be open to their perspective. If you still don’t agree, persuade them with objective data, research, and facts if appropriate to the situation.
If, for example, you’re working on a group project, and you’re absolutely sure of something, make your case for it so you can decide as a group on how to proceed. However, if it’s something where consensus isn’t required, it could be best to just listen and accept their opinion for what it is. That won’t make your viewpoint any less valid.
2 – Purely Positive Regard
You can’t please everyone, and you shouldn’t strive to. Doing so can be detrimental to your mental health. You see, the opinions of others don’t determine your value. You will always have critics, people who dislike or disapprove of you and how you live your life. But this is often a projection of their own inner conflicts rather than an actual problem with you.
You may remind them of someone who hurt them in the past, or they may be jealous of you and your success. Their negativity isn’t worth your time. Instead, focus on those who lift you up, treat you with kindness, and appreciate your uniqueness.
3 – More Respect Than You Give Yourself
Respect starts from within. So, if you want to be respected, you must first respect yourself. Self-respect manifests itself in how you conduct and treat yourself, and that sets the standard for how others will treat you.
If you struggle with self-respect, remember to be kind to yourself. Consider if the way you treat yourself would be an appropriate way to treat someone you respect.
4 – Mindreading Abilities
Some people, like empaths, can pick up on and even feel the emotions of others. But not everyone has this ability. Some are just oblivious to others’ feelings and aren’t able to read between the lines.
Just because you are one of those highly sensitive people, you can’t expect others to be as well. If something is bothering you, speak up. By doing so, you’ll open up the lines of communication.
You will save time and avoid the frustration of expecting someone to know what you’re feeling.
