Interesting Psychology Team
4) Reliance on feelings as facts
People who rely too much on emotional reasoning will ignore any evidence that contradicts their feelings. Even when a person has a ton of data that shows otherwise, he or she will reject it in favor of emotional reasoning.
This is because emotions often feel more real than facts. Our feelings can be very strong and difficult to ignore, which may cause us to make decisions based solely on our emotional reactions to situations. Sometimes they’re so strong they lead us to avoid even thinking about contradictory data or opinions, especially if those opinions differ from ours—or that someone we like!
For example, if you think your friend is right about something but your feeling tells you he’s wrong, you might shut down even looking at other points of view until you’re able to change your mind.
5) Blaming others for mood swings or poor judgment
If you blame others for your mood swings or poor judgment, that could be a sign of emotional reasoning. This tactic might give you some short-term satisfaction, but it makes it easier to fall into a blaming pattern and leads to a longer-term lack of self-responsibility.
Of course, there are times when other people are at fault and you have every right to be upset or let them know about it. For example, someone cut you off in traffic—that is clearly their fault and they should know about it because they might do it again next time.
6) Starting sentences with I feel…
Using I feel when you’re talking about something that’s actually true is a big red flag. Instead of saying, I feel like I’m not good enough, or I feel like he doesn’t care about me, it might be better to just state what’s true.
So, instead of thinking thoughts like those above, say things like: He never tells me he loves me anymore. My partner never compliments me or spends time with me. These feelings are based in reality and it may help to talk about them directly with your loved one so you can find out why they don’t give you what you need and how they see your relationship and how you can change things to make it better.
7) Viewing emotions as good or bad
If you view emotions as either good or bad, then any time you experience an emotion that falls into one of those categories, you start to fear it. And no matter how much you try to push these feelings away—or rationalize them away with logical reasons why they are appropriate and necessary—it is nearly impossible to get rid of them completely.
You can learn a lot about your reliance on emotional reasoning by simply observing your feelings in different situations. Do they have a habit of jumping out at times when they don’t serve any purpose? If so, then maybe there are some things in your life that need changing.
