Interesting Psychology Team
Predicting what might make someone uncomfortable isnβt easy, and even realizing after you’ve said something can be difficult, since people will always have different comfort levels around certain topics.
When you suspect that someone isnβt feeling safe or comfortable during your conversation, it canβt hurt to ask them – and steer the conversation elsewhere based on their response. But if you want to improve your social interactions, paying attention to body language is essential. It can tell you when someone feels relaxed or uncomfortable and knowing what you did to cause their discomfort can help you avoid making the same mistake again.
The first step in gauging someoneβs body language is to know what to look for. Here are ten signs that someone is feeling uncomfortable:
1 – Flinching and Wincing
Getting caught up in an uncomfortable situation can actually cause someone to wince or flinch slightly. If youβve said or done something out of line, and the person youβre with doesnβt want you to know theyβre uncomfortable, they will make these subtle gestures.
They may suddenly pull away or squint their eyes, and you might interpret it as physical pain at first. When you notice this nonverbal communication, think about what may have caused it. Perhaps you will realize that it was something you said, and a quick apology can help smooth things over.
2 – Talking Faster and Gesturing
Discomfort can activate our “Fight-or-Flight” response, which means an increased heart rate and faster breathing. In a conversation, this can look like someone gesturing wildly or speaking quicker and quicker. A fast-paced tone can also be an attempt to end the conversation sooner and you may observe that the person has become suddenly abrupt.
If you notice this, it may not be entirely your fault. Sometimes, people begin to feel uncomfortable, in general, if a conversation drags on or if they experience social anxiety.
3 – Scratching
Suppose youβre outside, and the person youβre with begins scratching a mosquito bite. In that case, thereβs nothing out of the ordinary about their itch, but if there’s a reasonable explanation, scratching can be a sign of discomfort.
Pay attention to this body signal, especially if it comes after youβve said something. Scratching around the ears, in particular, is often a sign that someone disagrees with you but doesnβt want to verbalize their thoughts.
4 – Nervous Laughter
Nervous laughter is incredibly common and often pops up during awkward and uncomfortable moments. Inappropriate giggling or laughter can help people relieve tension and cope with discomfort. If you want to know how someone feels around you, pay attention to whether or not their laughter is genuine or nervous.
5 – Breaking Eye Contact
When someone feels disinterested, overshadowed, or uncomfortable during a conversation, they might find reasons to look away. Frequent glances over your shoulder or at their phone can signal that theyβd like to get out of the situation. If you notice that someone keeps breaking eye contact with you, it might be time to stop talking and start listening.
Ask for their opinion about something or steer the topic toward them. Then, be sure to listen without interrupting. Their response will show you whether or not theyβd like to continue talking to you.
